Unfinished

“Chaos can be beautiful if you love all your ingredients.”- Celerie Kemble

The days were long, and the nights ushered periods of self-doubt, helplessness catalysed by the events and seasons that left us hopeless. A weary mental state, isolated emotions, ignored the physical state, and desolated spiritual life defined our situation. It was this kind of distress that prompted our journey to Ngazidja in Comoros.

Golden Tulip Grande Comore Moroni was our home for two weeks. The restaurant was on a private beach. We had devoted ourselves to exploring the area amidst our mystery while trying to unveil the world's beauty with a hope to tap the beauty within. Scuba divers walked along the coastal beaches free-spirited and in awe of the tranquillity the ambience brought. Business seemed unusual, as women in colourful ‘lesos’ [colourful shawls worn by women] sat in small groups engaging in deep conversations.

“This is a sign of a grand event about to take place. We call it Ada, which is basically a grand marriage. Its hallmark is, dazzling gold jewellery, two weeks of celebration and an enormous bridal dowry. You might ask yourself about the expenses incurred, well, the incurred expense is shared between both families and with a wider social circle, an Ada wedding on Ngazidja can amount to €50,000 (74,000 US dollars). Many couples take a lifetime to save for their Ada. It is not uncommon for a marriage to be attended by a couple's adult children,” said Ali, who was our tour guide and a native of the incredible Island. This baffled us, and we couldn't wait to witness the events unfold.

“It is brilliant to see people celebrate life and mark milestones in a style,” began Aissa. “During my study period abroad, I wished the world would end, yet I was on a journey of marking major milestones in my life. I was the definitive example of a misfit, jokes about my skin floating in the air like bubbles. They deprived me of critical services because of my skin colour, at this era and time, my forefathers wouldn’t believe that the system is just as they left it. The experiences traumatized me, and they haunt me with every sunrise.”

“Milestones!” exclaimed Carl. “If anyone banked a dollar on my relapse, they would be millionaires. If I could turn back the clock, I wouldn’t choose the decisions I chose. I would undo so many events and happenings. Today, I have been in and out of rehab. It’s almost that my life can’t be without the ‘substance’. I want to transit but, it's almost like the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. I have been going back and forth. I have let everyone down and the tunnel keeps getting darker with every relapse.”

“Aissa and Carl,” called out Bento. “I listen to you, and like a mirror, your stories reflect my own life. I live in a world of victimization and stigma. One event, one situation and one decision changed my life forever. The government is in full control of my health, society controls my self-perception, and I could never forgive myself for my decision. I’m on the verge of resigning and letting life be.”

Fear is temporary, regret is forever, I believed overcoming negative stereotypes and fears. I achieved the most I could in the academic bars. Today, the government that sponsored my academics, is the same government I’m in debt with. I have been trying to set foot on my career path, but luck has never been on my side. Someone has scammed me on every job opportunity, and no matter the interviews, I could never secure a job. Today I feel insecure as my future is uncertain.” shared Addae.

My soul was in blazing flames. I was in mopes with every single utterance. My eyes couldn’t ignore the burning sensation from my heavy heart. At the end of my rope, I couldn’t help but think of my journey. I needed an angel to save me from the agony of a toxic relationship. From anxiety, depression and extreme pain. If only life had a reset button, but this is not an option anyone of us had.

“A man is not old until his regrets take the place of his dreams - Yiddish, Proverb,” expressed the Old man. It threw us for a loop at the sound of his voice and sight of him. “I know I’m an uninvited guest. I will not dwell on how I found my way here because I love the mystery. I, however, would like to share with you a letter that changed my life,” continued the old man, as he pulled out an envelope from his pocket.

“Hello Tumor,” He began reading...

“I love you now!. I used to fear and fight you so that I could defeat you. Then I looked at my beliefs to see if they were about what I loved or what I feared. Clearly, they were about what I feared. And how I have learned to love you, which seemed like a strange idea to me. How much richer my life has become. Because, while I am sick and realize I could die soon, I have become a much more appreciative, loving person, much closer to my family and friends, with a greater sense of purpose, and have sped up my spirituality. So, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Spencer Johnson, M.D.”

“You own the first day and the last day of your life and everything in between. The last thing you want to do is count your years instead of making them count. Spencer Johnson shared his mind and heart with the world even though he suffered from a terminal disease. I’m not here for a pity party, but to remind you of your unfinished assignment, an undiscovered and unrealized dream. See beyond barriers and challenges. Fall in love with your scars, let them remind you of your strength and share it with the world around you. You might be a mess, but a beautiful unfinished mess. Don’t out-write yourself. Remember, happiness is not a destination, but a way of travel. The journey still continues as long as you are breathing. I will leave you to reflect and I hope you feel rejuvenated by the end of your visit.” signed off the old man as he walked away.